Triumphant Reality

I don’t live in this reality.

I live in the Reality of my Father in Heaven. I don’t belong here.

I belong to my Redeemer who became a servant upon earth but rules from all eternity. When I live in this world, despair, self-pity, and fear flood my soul. When I lift my gaze to my Heavenly Bridegroom, joy, hope, and assurance pour into my heart. My mind is refreshed and renewed with Faithful Promises from Scripture and the sweet, gentle voice of the Holy Spirit.

He is in me. I am not my own (I Corinthians 6:19-20). I don’t belong to myself any more than I belong to the world or people like me. I belong to a Risen Savior, a Resurrected Christ who never sinned and didn’t stay in the grave. He defeated death and the fear of death for me. Hallelujah! “Oh, death where is your sting? Oh grave, where is your victory?” (I Corinthians 15:55).

I don’t belong here. I walk in flesh and blood, but this body is a garment that I’ll one day put off and exchange for immortality (II Corinthians 5:1-4). In the meantime, my spirit is being rejuvenated every day, transformed into the glory of God as I throw open wide the doors of my mind and heart to Him—His Presence, His Truth (II Corinthians 3:18). Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6). He is a Person, and He is passionately pursuing intimacy with every person He created.

The Bible says, “Let all those rejoice who put their trust in You! Let them ever shout for Joy because You defend them. Let those also who love Your name be joyful in You. For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous. With favor You will surround him as with a shield” (Psalm 5:11-12).

Do you hear the exuberance in that? The utter triumph? David is rejoicing with all his might—David who brought down Goliath and hid from Saul for years before he was anointed king. God fulfilled His promise, but David learned to worship when nothing was going well. His wife and children were stolen, his men wanted to stone him, the Israelite army pursued him. How could he rejoice? What was going right? His relationship with God! His favor! His anointing! David believed in the faithful love of God, and he rejoiced in it!

Even later in his life, after he became king, circumstances seldom went smooth. He fell to temptation, his favorite son rebelled, his other sons were slain by an older brother. His land was plagued by an angel of judgment when he became proud and numbered the able-bodied men. God was moved by David’s heart, though, and forgave him and intervened time and again. And in the midst of it all, David praised the Lord. He LOVED the Presence of God. He knew that in God only were joy and pleasure found (Psalm 16:11).

David lived in a reality above the earthly realm. And he learned how to worship in the very middle of disaster and touch the Father’s heart. He knew how greatly the Father longed to fellowship with him, and he recognized rightly that the blood of animal sacrifices could never take away his sin. Rather, a broken and contrite heart releases mercy from the heart of God (Psalm 51:16-17).

Jesus said, “I Am”(John 8:58). He is the Reality Today that we’re called to abide in. Abide: Make our home, dwell, rest, remain. Why? Because He is the safety we crave. He is the Joy, the Peace, the Delight, the Freedom, and the Strength we desperately need.

We look for pleasure in sex, material possessions, games, and addictions. We look for strength in intelligence, body building, and weapons. We look for peace in compromise, control, and global treaties. But none of these things satisfy. Why? Because we were made for more. More goodness. More holiness. More glory than this world can imagine or ever offer. Only Jesus can.

All we have to do to receive these precious gifts is embrace His reality. Really. Just walk in. His arms are open and all the hosts of Heaven are holding their breath…

Waiting.

Preparation and Learning

Irene Gleeson wrote before her death, "It's often said that to be a good teacher, one has to become a great learner. Although I was the white teacher with the western training and the alphabet charts, I had become a student of the Acholi traditions and culture."


She was referring to her early months in Uganda, adjusting to life on a harsh missionfield. As I read her statement, though, immediately I saw again the vision God gave me in 2010 as I sought guidance for the next phase of my life. I saw myself with my children sitting at elementary school desks. The Holy Spirit stood teaching at the front of the classroom, and He smiled as He gazed at us. Then unexpectedly, He came around the desks and sat at the child's desk next to me--a desk much too small for Him! As one of the children climbed into His lap, He said tenderly to me, "We'll learn together now."


I had no idea that the vision was preparing my heart for reaching my children at their level and also for the job God had for me--being a Family Support Assistant who sits every day next to a child at school in order to assist with learning and behavior. God is so consistently kind in His guidance--and sees so clearly into our futures, even when we don't understand!


I've learned that visions give us hope for the immediate present and also guidance for the future. They often puzzle us a little and always surprise us. I've learned that God gives accurate details in many visions, but other times He speaks in idioms and analogies just as Jesus spoke in parables to reach the heart. Always, the Lord is seeking to prepare and guide as He ministers hope and healing.


The Lord has shown me visions that obviously represented spiritual truth in order to give me both the desire and courage to do something completely out of my comfort zone.


During my three years at the University of Great Falls as I obtained my Bachelor's in Psychology, I had an overwhelming longing increase each semester for the staff and students on campus to come to know the incredible love of the Father's heart. One afternoon while at my parents' house, I saw myself stand up on a table in one of my classrooms and begin beseeching the people to see and accept Jesus' great love for them. The vision widened and as I preached from that table, people from all over the campus began to stream into the classroom. Then I saw the water of the Holy Spirit soak the lush lawns of the campus between the buildings, saturating like a reservoir every inch of University soil with the love and grace of God. I knew the vision represented what God could do and I told the Lord, "If You give me the opportunity, I will preach."


The opportunity came. Not as I expected, with me spontaneously jumping up before fellow students, but formerly at a service held yearly in honor of Martin King Luther Jr.  President McAllister, who has encouraged me countless times, called me personally and said how much he had been moved by my thank-you speech at the University's scholarship banquet. Since the motto of the University is Uncommon Courage and because I had been given the Courage Award, I had shared my testimony of God's grace and strength both in a closed-country and in standing up to abuse in my marriage. President McAllister asked for me to share my heart regarding the truth that we are all equal in God's sight. Jesus had given me a podium! That day I watched people stream across the campus to Trinity Chapel to attend this ceremony honoring everyone who live lives of kindness, respect, and courage.


I praised God for blessing me with this opportunity to share His heart and thanked Him for fulfilling the vision. But God wasn't done. Just four months later, the University asked me to speak again--this time at my graduation baccalaureate. Overwhelmed, I went to the Throne of Grace and asked for the Holy Spirit's words and wisdom. I wanted to encourage, strengthen, and spur closer to Jesus the staff and family members attending in honor of our 2013 graduating class.


Jesus did it. He gave me the words and gave people who had become very dear to my heart His message of hope, compassion, and right-standing with Him. He is amazing. Always, He prepares us then sends us, empowered with His strength, into a future we could never have imagined or created for ourselves.


Jesus--Our Beautiful Redeemer!

Arm Wrestling God

“A Man wrestled with Jacob until the breaking of day…” Genesis 32:24

Recently the Lord showed me a picture of Him and me seated at a table across from each other. He smiled as He placed His elbow on the table, arm propped forward, fingers spread. He said, “Arm wrestle Me.”

In shock, I said, “I don’t want to wrestle You. You’ll win!” His eyes danced with merriment. “That’s not the point. Arm wrestle Me.” So I placed my elbow on the table and gripped Jesus’ hand. When I did, He exerted only a small amount of His strength. I pushed against Him, but I knew that the moment He applied all the strength of His arm, I’d go down in a flash.

As we wrestled against each other’s grips, warmth saturated my hand from the heat in His. Love radiated from His eyes, and suddenly I knew—the point of this encounter wasn’t to beat God or convince Him of anything. The point was to be in a relationship with Him, one that was intimate and personal, and to know the power of His strength.

Love burst forth in my heart for Him and all I wanted was to be in His arms. In that moment, our touch ceased to be competitive and became that of Lovers. I swept my thumb against His skin in an intimate caress.

Instantly, He leveled my arm as the fire in His eyes changed to that of fervent desire. He stood and walked around that table, pulling me right into the cradle of tenderness against His chest and the safety of His arms.

“Now when He saw that He did not prevail against him, He touched the socket of his hip…” Genesis 32:25

In His relationship with us, God is a gentleman. He will be a gentleman even when it means that it looks like we’re stronger than Him. He’ll let us 'defeat' Him, let us do things our way, and even let us go about boasting that we're tougher than Him. He’ll stand and watch as we walk up to the neighborhood bully or the biggest thug on the block and brag about how strong and skilled we are, about how we’ve even beat God. Then Jesus watches soberly as the thug takes us down.

Have you been there? Has life hit you in the face? Have circumstances flattened you on the back? Are the wounds and bruises still aching on the inside of you? Rest assured: God isn’t cruel. He examines our hearts and sees what we've been trusting in, outside of Him. He’s waiting for us to come back to Him and ask Him to defeat our enemies for us. But will we? Would you ask someone you believe to be weaker than you to stand up for you? Doubtful.

But then God murmurs again, “Arm wrestle Me.” Anger flares, and we demand, “Why? So you can beat  me when I’m down?” God says, “Arm wrestle Me.” So we do, in the hope that we’re still stronger than somebody.

And this time He doesn’t let us win.

In our pride, we think, “It’s just because I’m so weak. I’ve been beaten up by life. I need to recover.” So God lets us regain our strength. In fact, He fosters it. He nurtures us and feeds us, shelters us and medicates us. Then He says again, “Arm wrestle Me.” So we do. This time, He lets us almost beat Him. We use all our strength—every ounce of it. Then He takes us down.

He does this over and over and over again. Why? Because every good trainer knows that muscles have to be conditioned to gain strength. They have to be exercised and manipulated and massaged. Then God says, “Arm wrestle Me.” It’s the final test. He knows it’s time. Time for us to realize just how strong He is.

We’re strong now too. We know it. We can feel the force of our strength. In fact, we’ve been wrestling some smaller bullies and taking them down. But there’s still that big thug. Are we strong enough to stand up to him and not get taken down? So we take God’s challenge. We exert all our strength. We pour out sweat and blood and suddenly it dawns on us: As we’re sweating and struggling and intensely fighting Him—He’s just playing with us.

His eyes begin dancing once again. He starts laughing, rejoicing, delighting in our health and strength. Wonder grows in our heart, spills out from our lips. “Jesus…Jesus…You’re that strong?”

“Yes, Child. Yes, I’m that strong. And now—I will defeat your enemy for you. Do you want Me to?”

Our whole heart expands. We breathe the air of sudden, amazing freedom. “Yes, Daddy! Yes! I know how strong You are now. I know that if I try on my own again, that thug will call all his cronies and they’ll gang up on me and blindside me. But they can’t do that to You. That thug will go down in an instant when You take him on. Yes, Daddy, be my Defender, my Bodyguard, my Lifesaver, and my Friend!”

And God does what He’s always promised to do: He takes down the villain, the bad guy, the tormenting bully in our story. And we realize in that moment, with the thug thrashing in death throes on the floor, that we need never be afraid again.

Hallelujah! Our God is that strong!!!

“The Lord is the strength of my life. Of whom shall I be afraid?” Psalm 27:1